What a gift tonight was. I can always tell when there's something wrong with Madeline because she starts getting whiny, talking baby talk and getting ornery with the boys. Today started out bad. The baby talk began as soon as she woke up and I knew we were in for a long day. On the way back from the children's museum I had to discipline her for continually hurting her big brother.
Let me back up. As a baby, Madeline didn't seem to bond with me right away. She was less people oriented then her brothers and I wasn't quite sure how to break through to a personality that always seemed jealous of the attention spent on anyone else. She wanted to be held all the time but would barely show me affection. Hoever, she was extremely affectionate with her nana and auntie whenever they were around. And, although she was never a "quiet" child, she never seemed to talk about anything personal. That pattern of behavior continued until I started discovering that one of the keys to Madeline's heart was quality alone time with mom and dad.
This last fall I took her school clothes shopping to get ready for preschool and she perked up, by that evening, she began hugging me more, and even told me a "secret." She went to sleep quiet and peacefully without three trips downstairs to "go to the bathroom."
John and Charles Wesleys' mom, Susanna raised ten children and this is one of the ways she talked about motherhood to her husband in a letter:
"I am a woman, but I am also the mistress of a large family. And though the superior charge of the souls contained in it lies upon you, yet in your long absence I cannot but look upon every soul you leave under my charge as a talent committed to me under a trust. I am not a man nor a minister, yet as a mother and a mistress I felt I ought to do more than I had yet done. I resolved to begin with my own children; in which I observe, the following method: I take such a proportion of time as I can spare every night to discourse with each child apart. On Monday I talk with Molly, on Tuesday with Hetty, Wednesday with Nancy, Thursday with Jacky, Friday with Patty, Saturday with Charles."
I love that. She knew her children's emotional needs, to have mother's full attention for a period of time each week. Surely with only three children, I can do that too.
Tonight was Madeline's. We watched a girly movie, had oreos and milk and then had lotion massages...feet first, hands, faces even and ewww ears? not so good. She got to smell different types of lotion to decide which one was her favorite and then we spent time talking and having quality face to face time. By the end of the night, Madeline was telling secrets in a big girl voice again.
BTW, I love that under "Occupation" for Susanna Wesley in Wikipidia it says: Mother of Methodism. Not a bad gig for someone who didn't know they were helping to launch revival in the Anglican church. :)
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