Why being poor in spirit is essential for the trip

What does it mean to hold out my hands empty, poor in spirit? For this reformed follower of the American way, radical conversion. Poverty of spirit means clarity. I am poor, small, and easily lose my footing following the wrong path…any other belief in my own orientation skills is just a lie. But, and here’s the difference to why poverty of spirit is so utterly freeing in comparison with my usual self-reliance, the God of the Universe strides beside me. The inheritance of the saints, the power of the Universe, the joyful, eternal Gift-Giver is located within the Person always present. Here’s the working image: I am Lucy from CS Lewis Narnia Chronicles with her hands intertwined in the mane of Aslan, walking confidently, purposefully into the world. Never alone. Not ever alone.



Life, Way, Truth, Bread, Light, Peace, Creator and Re-Creator, …solid, unchanging, wave-calmer. He is here.

Take a moment to breathe in that game-changer. He is here. My healthy poverty is knowing that any other form of Life not coming from abiding in Him is counterfeit, any other bread moldy, any other water, polluted, any other truth, just embarrassing elvis-imitator mimicry.

My Father encouraged me to put a for-sale sign outside of my current self-reliant life, move down the street to a big welcome and curl up to dwell in the God of the Universe.


This is what this book is about: the for-sale sign, the moving and the path, sometimes rocky… of discovering that finding this new home was worth everything.

Meister Eckhart quote about abiding

Meister eckhart teaches,"He who abides always in a present now, in him does God beget his Son without ceasing".

Orthodox Way, prayer chapter

quote on prayer

There is no life without prayer. Without prayer there is only madness and horror.




Vasilii Rozanov
(Orthodox Way)

quote about collective mental illness

Fascinating way to talk about original sin:From NPR dick Gordon's The Story
Wednesday, April 13 2011 quote:
Adel, Krista's brother in law explained to her about how bizarre life in Libya had become: "We've been lied to (by Gadafi) and been lying to ourselves for so long just to get through the day that as a people we have all developed a collective mental illness."

http://thestory.org/archive/the_story_041311_full_show_new.mp3/view


Title of Program: What's Changing in Egypt?

original story of call to communion

It came quiet at first, the whisper of God’s voice, “Come away my beloved,” and I sensed the desire to go deeper. After school, I would often escape to the creek on the west side of our property to wash away the grime and confusion of high school. I called it my trysting place…a place of meeting and loving God. Nothing in those years came easy, but the running water over the cement blocks was the reminder that there was a deeper stream, more important message to live for than collecting boyfriends like charms on a bracelet.



I had watched my mother’s prayer life from a distance and got in the middle of intercessory sessions with my aunts. They warmed me and I leaned in like a camper toward a campfire. God always answered right there, comforting with His presence and then later gifting them with amazing stories of His miraculous work.


Later as I grew up in my evangelical church, I got truly confused. The altar calls drew us in for salvation and then full-time ministry. That was Sunday morning. That was it.  The understanding I began to receive was that I was saved in order to serve. Period. The whole Westminister Chatechism I had memorized years earlier in Sunday school that our purpose in life was “to love God and enjoy Him forever,” did not seem to fit the worldview of my new church. I became a worldclass fruit chaser. Winning souls and ministry in the church became my focus and though I still felt the call to be with God and listen to His Voice, I didn’t know how that fit into this vision of Christianity. It felt too slow in this fast-paced sales evangelism world.


Then in college I came upon an ancient strain of Christianity, the Eastern Orthodox, and was mesmerized. The purpose of life, the Eastern Orthodox said, was to be in communion with God. In light of a hunger for union, all matters of legalism quickly melted away. The question of morality then becomes not, “will this action break a law,” but, “ will it break our communion?”

a new direction

So dear friends,
It has been quite a year, a homeschooling year that was not entirely pleasant.  Yes, there were pleasant moments teaching my young ones to read and getting to read amazing books about Mother Teresa's obedience and exploring all the children's museums in the area.  But, I must admit that life with an active, not quite reasoning little one kept us from any sort of atmosphere of grace.  At least it was a constant struggle on my part as I tried to direct education and keep the climbing, exploring, highly-vocal Xman from killing himself. 

I set the blog down entirely in part because of the lack of time and in part because I was searching for the new direction that my writing was supposed to take and wanted to listen until it took shape.  I'm excited to start working on a book/article? of moment by moment intimacy (communion) with God, the struggle and how it shapes our lives and will be using the blog as a sort of dumping ground.  You are welcome to read quotes/ mini stories as I publish them but I will be writing much less on motherhood and the home and more small pieces on prayer and daily spirituality.  Please pray for me in this new calling that any fruit that comes out of this work would be part of a balanced life and inspired by the Holy Spirit.

I love you all and have enjoyed our bloggy relationship!

Summer Joy

gratitude

I'm learning to be more aware of His Presence who is always close.  I am learning to trust His timing.  I am learning that I am complete through union with Christ (Galatians 2:10) and do not have to keep accumulating things, people and accomplishments in order to have worth.  I am learning that I only need to write when it is coming out of His Presence...no more chasing after fruit...only God. I repent of rancid fruit that has come from another source.

I have learned so many things this year and have been doing/leading a 16 week course on inner healing written by Terry Wardle of Ashland Seminary in Ohio.  Powerful stuff.  I feel like I have a front row seat for Isaiah 61 work: freeing captives and setting prisoners free. 

I'm linking to A Holy Experience and her gratitude community.

polished red toenails
daffodils pushing up through snow
the flash of learning in my son's eyes
xavi dancing with Madeline on the kitchen floor
warring in prayer this morning with my sisters
bean plants six inches high
Enough manna for today
Journey women pushing up through fear
Holy Week opportunities to preach
Grace in Andrew's goodnight kiss